Stinky Car Ride

Yesterday Rich, Amir, the dogs and I all headed up to Bountiful in the late afternoon to see Rich's family. We made sure that the dogs went to the bathroom before we got in the car (mostly Jasper because he has the hardest time in longer car rides) We decided to not bring their kennel because Jasper is almost Ruthie's size so they both don't fit in it together. 

In the first five minutes of the ride Rich and I smelled a funky smell. It smelled like Jasper. I looked in the back seat and he had pooped on the back seat. Which included the diaper bag, a blanket, some papers and a shirt. We stopped at the McDonalds around the corner from our house and Rich cleaned it up. We used all the wipes cleaning that one up. 

Then about half way there I discovered another accident. This time on the floor. We waited to clean that one up until we got to our destination. That one didn't smell. 

Then, about 10 minutes away I hear a gagging sound. I look back to see Jasper in the process of puking. He puked up the hot dog that he stole from Amir prior to leaving. At this point I just about lost it.      Side note: I usually have a pretty strong stomach but when it comes to hot dog vomit.............No.

I had to hold my nose and close my eyes with my window rolled down in order not to puke from the smell of that. 

We finally arrived at our destination in one, semi-stinky piece.

Locked In

This last week I have been home sick from work. I stayed home Tuesday and Wednesday. (Thursday I had off already for Katherine's wedding and Fridays are always off) 

On Wednesday Amir was doing really good. He played mainly in the livingroom where I was laying on the couch. After he ate lunch I layed back down on the couch and he headed for his room. This is a normal thing. He shut his door when he went in, also a normal thing. I got up to go open the door so I could still hear and see him (usually I put a blanket in the door way so he cant close it all the way) but this time as I reached out for the handle I heard a small "click" when I was just inches from the handle. Once I heard that I knew what he was doing. He was trying to lock the door. He usually does this but is unsuccessful in actually locking the door. But this time, he actually locked it!! Of course he also had both dogs in his room with him AND my cell phone. (we don't have a land line)

I was talking to him through the door trying to get him to unlock the door. He didn't. So I went around the house and gathered every single key that I could find that we didn't already know what it went to. After that I tried every single key in the door. None were successful. Then I decided I would try the old "credit card in the door" trick. Didn't work. About this time the dogs were starting to panic. At this point I decided to run to the neighbors house and use their phone. I went to the neighbor to the West. I knocked on their door and there was no answer. Then I went to the neighbor to the East. No answer. At this point I begin to panic a little because Amir and the dogs are in the house by themselves locked in his bedroom. So then I ran across the street because I noticed their front door and garage were open. I knocked on their open front door and nobody came. So then I went to the backyard where the garage was open.. NOBODY was home. Smart thing to do right? Leave your house unattended with your doors open. Yes.

To make a long story short I went to what felt like almost every house on my street. I finally found someone about four or five houses down and they let me use their cell phone. I called Rich so he could come home and save us. 

When he got home he also tried the credit card trick... Didn't work. He ended up having to break the handle. I was completely okay with that because I didn't like the fact that his door could lock in the first place. So now, when he locks the door its a little harder to get into but you just have to turn the handle harder than normal so the whole thing shifts. 

Puppy Antics

When I came home today what I walked in to find was interesting. It makes me angry/sad/annoyed/bitter/resentful/furious and wrathful. All at once. What I saw was a torn up couch cushion, a black banana peel - chewed up (I have NO idea where the dogs could have found that) a chewed up horse figurine, two dog beds strewn across the living room floor, one chewed up plastic spoon, a few torn up tissues and paper towels, some sort of wetness on the coffee table, pee all over the kitchen floor (which was better than all over the living room carpet) and other misc chewed up items all over the floor. As I speak Jasper is running around the living room floor attempting to itch his "behind" as he has not mastered the art of "scooting". And I am still trying to get it through both Ruthie AND Jasper's minds that wrestling on the couch, especially next to me is not allowed.

I hate my dogs. 

Jasper

We got a new puppy a few weeks ago. We picked him because one, he looks like ruthie. Two, he was born with no tail. He was special and cute all because of that. But after having him home for a few weeks I'm beginning to realize that not having a tail isn't great at all!! He is having a hard time in the potty training department and so now when he has to go #2 and we are around he'll back up in to a corner and go.. But without a tail, it just comes straight out. There is no tail to shoot it down to the ground. So when he backs into a corner against a wall... HE POOPS ON THE WALL!

The first few times it happened we didn't actually see it and we could not figure out how he could get it to stick on the walls/doors. But finally about a week ago I witnessed this oddity. Luckily, it wasn't just me there to see it because I wouldn't have been able to get anyone to believe that it happened had they not witnessed it with their own eyes. 

Needless to say, he is a very special puppy and there are days where I just want to put him outside and never let him back in. Ever. But he's cute and he's calmed the crazy Ruthie down quite a bit. So I guess its a good balance.

My Experience at the Gym...

So I was at the gym yesterday and I witnessed one of the funniest things ever. But it was also one of the saddest and I feel kind of bad for the guy this happened to....


I usually go in the "women's only" area... Not this time. I decided to venture out and so I could plug my headphones in and watch some TV on those little screens that they have on some of the machines... I was on one of the bikes in the very back and this person two rows up caught my eye. He was a younger guy, he had some pretty big muscles... He was really really REALLY ripped. And no, I did not notice him for the reasons your thinking of or probably the obvious reasons that I just mentioned. He was on a treadmill and I noticed him because his phone started ringing really loud. I'm talking, unusually loud. So loud that everyone turned to look to see where the horrible screeching phone noise was coming from. When he realized that everyone was looking at him and that it was HIS phone ringing he began to fumble around in his gym short pockets to get his phone. He was fumbling so hard for it (obviously embarrassed) that his shorts came partially off. Now, I don't know how this happened. It could have been because he was running and must not have had his draw strings tight or it could have been the combination of running somewhat fast and both hands in each pocket.. No one will ever know. Anyway, they came partially down so you could see his red boxer briefs (that's right, red to match his red shorts) but not enough to where you could see any of his bare leg... At this point his only concern was to pull his shorts back up to where they were supposed to be. At this point, his phone had stopped ringing but another loud sound came from his shorts. It was just three loud beeps that must indicate a voice mail. He got his pants back up and went to go for his phone for a second time and it began ringing again. This time, instead of not being able to get his phone due to his pants falling down he stumbles and falls to the ground. And when I saw ground I mean the treadmill ground. His phone still ringing.


Everyone within a 5 foot radius jumped off whatever they were doing to help him and see if he was okay. I stayed where I was and continued what I was doing. I was a good ways away from him but I had the perfect view of everything that was happening. Don't worry, had he not been okay or if there was any blood I would have been a little worried. But he was fine. He got up, went to the locker room and came back within ten minutes to continue his run on the same machine.