OK I understand how scissors can beat paper.. And I get how rock can beat scissors. But there is no way that paper can beat rock! The paper is supposed to magically "wrap around the rock" leaving it immobile? Why cant paper do this to scissors? In fact, screw scissors!!
Why cant paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled paper constantly suffocating students when they are trying to take notes in class? ... I'll tell you why! It's because paper cant beat anybody. A rock would tear the paper up in about two seconds!
I choose rock whenever I play "Rock Paper Scissors". Then when people claim that they won my rock with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say something like, "oh, I'm sorry - I thought your paper would protect you" ....
